The Golden Rule
Count Household Need,
Not Perceived Need
Base your time estimates on what the task actually requires when done efficiently, not how long it currently takes due to inefficiency, over-supervision, or lack of systems.
Morning routine with kids
If one parent gets the kids ready in 20 minutes using a system (checklists, established routines), but the other parent spends 2.5 hours hovering and micromanaging, the household need is 20 minutes.
COUNT THIS
20 minutes of active supervision
DON'T COUNT
2.5 hours of inefficient over-supervision
How to Estimate Time
Think in Terms of a Typical Week
Don't overthink it. Use your average, typical week — not the crazy week when everything broke, and not the vacation week when nothing happened.
EXAMPLE
"I grocery shop about once a week for 1.5 hours" → Enter 6 hours/month (1.5 hours × 4 weeks)
Count Active Work, Not Passive Presence
Only count time when you're actively doing the task, not when you're just in the same room.
✓ COUNT THIS
Actively supervising homework, helping with problems, explaining concepts
✗ DON'T COUNT THIS
Sitting in the same room on your phone while kids do homework independently
Include the Invisible Work
Many tasks have invisible components that happen before or after the visible execution. Count these separately.
Grocery Shopping includes:
- →Meal planning (separate task, 1.5× cognitive multiplier)
- →Making the list (separate task, 1.3× cognitive)
- →Shopping itself (1.4× physical + cognitive)
- →Putting groceries away (1.1× physical)
Kids' Activities includes:
- →Research and enrollment (separate, 1.5× invisible management)
- →Managing schedules and carpools (separate, 1.5×)
- →Driving to activities (1.0× baseline)
Round to Reasonable Chunks
Don't agonize over exact minutes. Round to 15-minute or 30-minute increments. Close enough is accurate enough.
Common Traps to Avoid
Counting Inefficiency as Household Need
If you spend 3 hours "cleaning" but 2 of those hours are distracted scrolling, the household need is 1 hour.
SOLUTION
Ask yourself, "How long would this take if I focused without interruption?"
Double-Counting Tasks
If you both claim "I do all the cooking," only one of you is right. Check with each other before finalizing.
SOLUTION
In Open Book mode, discuss who actually owns each task. In Reveal mode, be honest with yourself.
Forgetting System-Building Work
If you created the morning routine system, that's invisible management work (1.5× multiplier). Don't let it go uncredited just because the system now runs smoothly.
SOLUTION
Look for tasks like "Family calendar management," "Meal planning," "Activity logistics" — these capture the system-building.
Over-Crediting "Being Available"
Being on call is real work, but it's not the same as active work. If you're "watching the kids" while they play independently for 2 hours, that's not 2 hours of active childcare.
SOLUTION
Count active engagement time. If kids need intervention every 20 minutes, count that intervention time.
Comparing Your Effort to Your Partner's
"I work so much harder than they do!" — Maybe, but that's what the data will show. Right now, just be honest about your time.
SOLUTION
Fill out your side independently, then let the numbers speak.
Perfectionism Paralysis
"I can't remember exactly how many hours I spent on X last month!"
SOLUTION
Make your best guess. The confidence bands account for estimation uncertainty. Rough accuracy is better than perfect inaction.
Quick Tips for Success
Start with the big stuff
Focus on tasks that take more than 30 minutes/week. Don't sweat the tiny 5-minute tasks.
Use the "Add Custom Task" button
If a task isn't listed, add it! The tool provides suggested multipliers.
Think monthly, not weekly
Some tasks happen sporadically. It's easier to think "I do this about 2 times a month for 3 hours each" than to convert to weekly.
Don't forget seasonal tasks
Snow shoveling, yard work, holiday planning — estimate total annual time and divide by 12.
Save as you go
The tool saves your progress in your browser. You don't have to finish in one sitting.
"What About...?"
What if we genuinely disagree on how long something takes?
Use the time it takes when done efficiently (the "household need"). If you can't agree, time it for a week and see. The goal is honesty, not winning.
What if I do a task 'better' or 'more thoroughly' than my partner would?
Count the time for the standard that needs to be met, not your personal preference. If you choose to spend extra time for perfection, that's your choice — not household need.
What about emotional labor or relationship maintenance?
This tool doesn't capture that well. Acknowledge it in your conversations, but know that it's beyond the scope of task-based tracking.
Should I count time spent managing contractors or hired help?
Yes! Use "Vendor / contractor management" (1.5× cognitive load). Getting quotes, scheduling, supervising — that's real work even if someone else executes.